


i could build a home for your world

by SaadieStuff



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Cabin Fic, Canon Compliant, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Future Fic, Handyman Michael, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post 1x13
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-07
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-06-23 07:11:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19694446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaadieStuff/pseuds/SaadieStuff
Summary: A story in which Michael and Alex repair everything from the cabin, to their hearts.Michael allows himself to close his eyes, and for a moment, the entire world narrows to the sliver of space where Alex’s skin meets his. It’s too small to exist there -- that’s always been their problem.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hazel_Athena](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazel_Athena/gifts).



> Subtitle: Fixing ALL the things!
> 
> This is my CrashFest2019 fic for Hazel_Athena! I really hope you like it - it was a great prompt! :)
> 
> The prompt was: "Fic post episode 10 - Malex try out the just being friends thing, which involves Michael doing projects all around the cabin because he doesn’t want it falling down around Alex’s ears. Romance ensues after mutual pining." 
> 
> Thanks to [maniskka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mansikka/profile) for giving this an edit and to [estel_willow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/estel_willow/profile) for listening to me whine quite a lot about how this had gotten so much longer than my usual 2-3k, and to both for cheerleading/brainstorming! <3

“I hear you’re in the market for a new handyman?” Michael says smoothly as he sidles up to Alex at the bar.

“Geez, can’t keep a secret in this town,” Alex quips, allowing a small smile before taking another swig of his beer.

Michael smiles back, though he looks a little nervous, which Alex attributes to the fact that this is already the most successful small talk they’ve managed in some time. Alex is wrong.

“I think you should hire me,” Michael blurts out. There had been so much more he’d planned to say first.

“Uh, what?” Alex asks, not sure he’s heard right.

Michael takes a deep breath, accepting that he’s just jumped in with two feet. Plan out the window, he throws on some of his old swagger for size instead. “I assume it’s some odd jobs around your cabin? I can do that.”

“Odd jobs...” Alex says slowly, “And a lot of work on the roof.”

“Well, I’m a genius, and good with my hands.” Michael could kick himself for how unintentionally flirty that had come off, but he carries on, “I’ve held down a few carpentry gigs over the years. I don’t have any tools but--”

“Actually, Mr. Wilson came by the other day to survey the job and drop off his tools. That night he threw out his back chasing around his grandkids. Doubt he’ll be by to get them any time soon.”

“Great! I mean, not for Mr. Wilson, but-- you know. So, is that a yes? I’m hired?”

Alex's mouth opens and closes several times. He needs a moment to process. “What are we doing, Guerin?” he asks, tone quiet and cautious.

“I need the cash; you need the service. A simple business transaction,” Michael says casually.

“So... I’m allowed to pay you, and not in beers?”

“Only friends accept payment in beers. And we’re not friends, never have been.” Michael says it gently, with a wistful smile, which Alex returns.

“No, we’re not,” Alex sighs. He wants to ask what Michael thinks they are, since he doesn’t seem to have believed Alex’s now repeated assertion that they’re family.

But Michael is a few steps ahead of him. “I figured we could try something easy. Me, handyman; you, homeowner. Defined, uncomplicated."

Alex desperately wants to take this invitation back into Michael’s life. It’s been near impossible for him to keep his distance with what Michael has been going through, even though it’s what Michael wants-- _wanted_.

“Okay,” Alex agrees, deciding less is more, for now.

“Isobel looked into it for me and every good handyman and woman in this town is booked for the season. And you shouldn’t delay with these things, it’s dangerous and--" he stops abruptly, "Wait… did you say ‘okay’?”

“I did. But will you get to it much faster? You have two other jobs don’t you?” Alex means it as a purely logistical question, but he cringes as soon as the words leave his mouth.

“Yeah… I do,” Michael admits, bristling a little, despite himself.

“Sorry-- I didn’t-- Jobs are good,” Alex stammers out, feeling deflated at already needing to delicately take his foot out of his mouth.

“They’re great,” Michael says sarcastically, dropping his gaze to focus his attention on fiddling with a drink coaster. “Two jobs with sporadic, crappy, shifts because I’m the newbie with a record who came with no references following a string of firings.”

Alex grimaces sympathetically. “I’m sure Saunders will take you back one of these days,” Alex says hopefully, “I mean, if you want that.” Alex bites his lip, desperate to say something encouraging to redeem himself, “No one can fix a car like you can.”

“I hope you’ll be saying that about me and roofs soon," Michael says softly, meeting Alex's gaze again.

“I hope so too," Alex echoes. "You're hired."

“Yeah?" Michael smiles a toothy grin. "I think it'll be good. With no neighbours nearby I can use my powers, and work at weird hours, as long as I'm not disturbing you.”

“How do you know that? You’ve never been to my cabin have you?” Alex asks, wondering if Michael had done the odd drive-by as Alex had with him these last months - hoping to catch a glimpse without intruding.

 _Oh boy._ “Just a guess given the area it’s in,” Michael lies.

“Ah. Well, you're right, so you can work whenever - powers and all - won’t bother me. I don’t sleep much these days," Alex lets slip.

"Oh…"

Alex hand-waves it away. "I'm working mostly from home but there are stretches where I'm back at forth to the base. I'll be in and out of your hair I guess.”

“Works for me,” Michael rushes out, gulping, trying not to think too hard about Alex's _fingers_ in his hair. “Well, let me know your schedule. You don't want to be regularly woken up by me hammering on your roof, do you?”

“Probably not," Alex concedes, then clears his throat. "So... I’ll pay you what I was going to pay Mr. Wilson?”

“Sounds good. But you can ogle me when I’m sweaty and shirtless, no extra charge,” Michael says, intentionally turning on the charm this time.

They part with shy smiles on their faces and a plan to meet at the cabin in two days' time.

**~~~~~**

"This is more work than I expected," Michael says as he looks down at the list they've just made during a walkabout of the cabin property.

"Is that alright?"

"Yeah, it's great! It'll keep me busy, and out of trouble, for a few months," Michael jokes, but there is a sting of truth there.

"Good. Honestly I think it was a little much for Mr. Wilson… he's semi-retired and I don't think he wanted such a big job."

"Perhaps _convenient_ he got injured?" Michael suggests with a raised eyebrow.

"Maybe? For his sake I hope he’s faking it. He seemed like a nice guy, and putting your back out... not fun. He could have just told me though, or elected to take on only certain repairs.”

“Sometimes it’s hard to admit when you’re in over your head,” Michael shrugs, pretending like it’s _not_ loaded.

Alex nods knowingly. “Well, I’m admitting that I’m over my head with the roof-- uh, no pun intended?”

Much to Alex’s delight, Michael actually chuckles. “I’m sure you could figure it out as well as me.”

“I could figure out how to do it, but actually doing it? I don’t need to log anymore hospital time on account of falling off my roof,” Alex shakes his head softly, then looks up and makes sharp eye contact with Michael, “And I don’t want you falling off my roof either. I only agreed to this because with your powers it will be relatively safe.”

“Oh sure, but you were willing to let gramps muck around up there?” Michael teases.

“Mr. Wilson is a professional!” Alex argues back playfully.

They banter the rest of the way back to Michael’s truck.

“Oh, I meant to ask, what’s that funny looking little building out back?” Michael questions through the rolled down window as he hops into the driver’s seat, pointing to the opening of the clearing of trees just ahead.

“A sauna. A pretty fancy one. But it’s broken.”

“That wasn’t on the list of jobs.”

“By design.”

“You don’t want me to fix it?”

Alex shrugs, “Nah, what am I going to do with a sauna?”

“Oh, I don’t know… sit in it? Relax?”

“Sounds boring,” Alex smirks.

**~~~~~**

The first week Michael works on the cabin, Alex barely ever runs into him, either sleeping or at the base, or off with Kyle running errands of the secret variety. But Alex knows he’s been around at least four out of the last six days from the progress Alex has observed. For this, it crosses Alex’s mind that perhaps Michael just really needs the cash, Alex the only sucker who would hire him, and that Michael had asked for a rough of Alex’s schedule for the purpose of avoiding him. But that’s distinctly not the vibe he got last week when they went over the jobs together, when Alex’s face actually hurt from smiling so hard by the end. He continues to ponder this over his first cup of coffee when he’s startled by a few loud bangs against the cabin in quick succession.

Assuming it’s Michael, Alex presses the button to start another cup of coffee, before stepping out onto his porch, coffee mug in hand. He finds Michael beginning to reinforce one of the posts holding up the porch roof.

“Hey.”

“Oh, hey. Sorry, did I wake you?” Michael asks, observing Alex’s bedhead and pajamas. “I thought you’d be up by now.”

“Don’t worry, I was.”

“Good. I had to come earlier today because my other shifts got switched around last minute,” Michael explains, a tinge of annoyance in his voice.

“You know you don’t have to come here as often as you have been," Alex offers.

“Oh…” Michael looks a little forlorn, and turns back towards the plank of wood he’s holding up.

“I mean, I don’t mind, I just-- you’re busy. And this job is flexible… I don’t want you to feel any pressure to get things done on any kind of timeline.”

“Nah, Alex, the pressure is on!” Michael says, becoming more animated again, “Some of these posts are so rotten it’s practically an emergency. Can’t have it falling down around your ears.”

“Really?” Alex looks a little alarmed, he hadn’t realized it was quite that bad.

Michael nods.

“Well, that's concerning, but if it can last another few minutes, you’re welcome to come in - I’m making fresh coffee.”

Michael beams at him and then tries to reel it in a few degrees. “Uh, I just need to put another two or three nails in here so I can let it go,” Michael explains.

“Okay,” Alex says, and sips at his coffee, watching Michael line up the next nail and the hammer and--

Alex looks away so quickly that Michael catches the movement out of the corner of his eye. 

“Alex,” Michael calls out, tone tender. It’s not a question - he _knows_.

Alex gulps and doesn’t turn back towards Michael. “It’s been a long time but I guess I’m never going to be a fan of seeing a hammer swinging that close to your hand…” he muses.

“I’ll be careful with it,” Michael promises. "Soon I'll probably switch over to using my powers mostly. I just wanted to get a feel for the best angle to take with this grain."

Alex noticeably quirks an eyebrow.

"It's a craft, Alex," Michael drawls.

Alex huffs out a small laugh.

Michael smiles, then his face drops when he remembers he’s not quite done with the hammer. “I’ll just finish this up…”

“Right. Go ahead,” Alex says, not heading inside like Michael expected him to, instead choosing to peer deeply into his coffee for the remaining two nails. “How _is_ your hand these days?” Alex asks as Michael sets the hammer down. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“I don’t mind. And it’s good as new,” Michael says.

Alex stares him down.

Michael sighs. “It gets a bit twitchy sometimes… I think it’s psychological. I really wasn’t ready to have Max heal it… so...” he trails off, and rubs the back of his neck with his good hand. “I _am_ ready for that coffee though.”

**~~~~~**


	2. Chapter 2

**~~~~~**

Over the next week, Michael makes more scattered appearances, but Alex is also home more often, leading to frequent run-ins and several cups of coffee. It’s easy to fill the space with talk of the various cabin projects, and while they are avoiding more sensitive topics, the conversation is usually effortless, peppered with genuine smiles and occasional bouts of laughter. 

Today, Michael comes by around noon, when Alex is around, and is still working by the time Alex is making dinner.

When they’d chatted earlier in the day, Michael had complained about having no shifts until the next evening. So Alex decides to take a chance. Michael made the first move of their reconciliation. Now it’s Alex’s turn. 

“Do you want to stay for dinner? I bought way too much meat and--” Alex had come up with excuses for needing Michael to help him eat it - _it doesn’t freeze well_ \- but he changes his mind, done playing those games. “It’s good. I think you’ll like it,” he says confidently instead.

“Oh, um, ya, sure. That’d be great. Thanks,” Michael smiles shyly.

“If you want…” Alex starts, shifting on his feet, “you can take a shower first.”

“You can smell me from there, huh?” Michael huffs a laugh.

“I _was_ promised sweaty _and_ shirtless. You’re only sweaty,” Alex teases.

Michael grins, biting at his lip to keep himself from grinning too wide, and shakes his head in amusement.

Alex’s expression softens, but his tone turns serious, “Really though, it’s been a long, hot, day for you, and I’m making it longer. So you’re welcome to it.”

“I think I will take you up on that... I am kind of pretty gross. How long until dinner is ready?”

“Soon. Probably good timing if you head in now,” Alex says, nodding towards the cabin.

“Okay,” Michael agrees and puts down the tools.

He follows Alex inside. He’s used the bathroom in the cabin more than a few times now, but tails closely behind Alex anyways, and almost walks into him when Alex stops abruptly at the bathroom door. He turns around to Michael standing only inches away.

“I’ll get you a towel,” Alex mutters without stepping back.

“Thanks,” Michael says, as they stand there for a beat, Alex’s eyes dropping to Michael’s lips that way they do, before Michael makes a _hasty_ retreat, sidestepping into the bathroom, pulse racing for how close their faces had been. 

By the time Alex makes it back, Michael is already in the shower. He’s left the bathroom door cracked open, so Alex takes it as an invitation to step just barely inside and put a towel, a clean t-shirt, and fresh socks, in a neat pile on the floor. Alex averts his eyes from the shower, even though it’s well steamed up. He feels suddenly warm, but blames it on the steam. 

Fifteen minutes later, Michael wanders into the kitchen, just as Alex is plating their food.

“Perfect timing,” Alex announces, and passes Michael a beer.

“Thanks. And thanks for the shirt. I also borrowed your shampoo… my hair is about to be a disaster. That stuff was not made for curls.”

Over dinner they carry on a pointless conversation about shampoo, followed by different varieties of roof shingles. Then they fall silent. 

“Guess we’ve finally run out of comfortable small talk…” Alex tries.

Michael gulps, “I think so. But it has been… comfortable, hasn’t it?”

“Yeah, it’s been nice. But it can probably only last for so long while we avoid more serious topics,” Alex says, against his own instinct to pull his punches.

Michael hangs his head. He was hoping to put this off awhile longer. Maybe forever. “When we talk about things that matter… we tend to hurt each other. But fortunately or unfortunately, our _connection_ has never required that much talking -- at least not with words… So...”

Alex sucks in a breath, and starts poking at the remaining food on his plate. “Sometimes I think we’ve done a lot more talking over the years than we give ourselves credit for. There’s a lot of... _gentler_ words I remember… but it’s all hazy, like a dream.”

Michael smiles knowingly, “You mean our pillow talks.”

Alex looks up from his plate, eyes a little wide. “So those actually happened? I know that sounds dumb--”

“I’m not always sure either,” Michael admits. “It’s always so quiet right after we… you know…" he cocks his head suggestively, "You’d think any talking would be loud in comparison, but when I try to remember those conversations… it’s like chasing a whisper. I catch bits but… ”

“I know what you mean. Like they evaporate by morning.”

Michael nods slowly. “That was the idea I guess? Say anything we want, things we don’t tell other people… things only meant for each other. And then, we could pretend we didn’t hear it. We could pretend we didn’t say it.”

“It all only existed in our little bubble.”

Michael nods. "I call it our pocket," he reveals.

“Pocket? That’s cute,” Alex grins, before looking shyly away again.

“Guess so,” Michael smiles sheepishly.

Alex marshalls his thoughts, confidence boosted to know that the only person who _could_ understand, _does_ understand -- but still, he's unsure. “This might sound crazy, but I've thought of it almost like... dipping into an alternate universe where only we exist. I know that _isn't_ what's happening but--"

"Hey, that sci-fi shit doesn't sound all that crazy when you're talking to a literal alien from another planet," Michael assures him.

Alex smiles briefly at that before continuing. "I’m _sure_ we took those murmurs with us, I’m sure they’re woven into this _thing_ between us somehow. Yet I never knew if anything we said in that _pocket_ counted for anything out in the real world.”

“Wow," Michael barely breathes out, and thinks for a long moment. "Maybe - maybe it doesn’t count. ‘Cause when the whole world goes away… we’re good together. And when the world gets in the way… we...” 

Alex exhales sharply. This conversation is about to fly too close to the sun too soon. He steers it away. “I remember you often said things that didn’t really make sense. But now I realize... you were actually talking about alien stuff, just in really vague terms, right?”

Michael nods. “You must have thought I was a total weirdo all these years.”

Alex cracks a real smile at that. “I don’t know what I thought. I just liked to learn about you… so I tried to find the metaphor in whatever you were saying. And often what I found was something I could relate to. Something I understood.”

“You hit home a lot for me too,” Michael admits quietly, “You told me about war. You worried what it said about you that you were good at it. And how no one you worked with - spent all your time with - knew who you really were, and how could you find yourself in all of that?”

Alex scarcely remembers saying any of that out loud to anyone, ever. But if he did, it would have been to Michael, of that he is certain. “I guess we learned a lot about each other in those moments.”

“I think we did,” Michael says. “I also remember… in those moments... we made a lot of promises too.” He runs a hand through his hair before slumping back into his chair, exhausted in every way possible.

“If we could figure out how to have those kind of conversations, I don’t know--” Alex looks away, feeling silly for how poetic he’s about to sound, “If we could have them... in the light…? Maybe we could have something,” Alex says gently. 

“Ooh boy, I’m beat, Alex,” Michael says suddenly, rocking forward in his chair, looking ready to spring to the door.

“Of course, yeah, you should go get some rest,” Alex agrees quickly. 

Michael gets up and grabs his plate.

“Leave it, I’ve got it-- I’ve got it,” Alex says, rising to take the plate from him, careful to make sure their fingers don’t come close to touching.

**~~~~~**

It’s not until several days later that they meet again. Alex pulls up the driveway to see Michael on a ladder propped up against the cabin.

“I’d hoped with your powers I wouldn’t be finding you on any rickety ladders,” Alex calls up to Michael, who is up just a little higher than Alex is tall.

“I can’t float myself around. Telekinesis is just handy for getting the supplies and tools up here. And believe me it is handy.”

“Where did you even find this piece of crap?” Alex asks as he inspects the ladder.

“It was in a pile of old firewood, out back.”

 _That’s where it belongs_ , Alex decides, as he runs his hand over the thin rail. “You’re worried about the porch falling down on me. Meanwhile you’ve got yourself a death-trap of a ladder.” Alex sounds unimpressed.

Michael ignores him.

“What are you even doing?” Alex asks, shielding his eyes from the sun as he looks up at Michael whose elbows are on the roof, head low to it, “And why don’t you do it from the roof?”

“These eavestroughs are on the newer side - reusable,” Michael explains, voice muffled, “I’m trying to take them off carefully so I don’t damage them, but I need to see what I’m doing because the screws are all over the place. This is just the best angle.”

“Okay... well, be careful,” Alex urges. “If it’s a big hassle I can just buy new ones.”

“Look out,” Michael warns, as several screws fly past Alex and join a neat pile on the ground, then, an entire chunk of eavestrough floats down slowly. “See, all good!” Michael exclaims, too soon.

There’s an awful noise of metal scraping on metal as a second chunk of eavestrough, now lacking the support of the first, begins to detach. Michael’s ladder, resting against it, shifts sharply at the same time.

“Shit!” Michael yells as his left leg swings off the rung of the ladder, his arms clambering to brace on the roof, powers flailing out to secure the ladder and eavestrough.

Simultaneously, Alex scrambles to steady the ladder with his left hand, and with the other quickly reaches up to blindly grab at Michael’s right ankle to hold his foot to the rung. In doing so, Alex’s fingers slip under the hem of Michael’s pants, meeting bare skin just above his short socks.

Michael jolts a little at the contact, which doesn’t help to kill his momentum, but he manages to get his other foot planted.

“Phew,” Michael sighs, resting his arms on the roof, and starting to laugh.

Alex does not laugh, nor does he release Michael’s ankle. “ _Please_ , be careful.”

“I’m fine.”

“Guerin-- please, I just want you to be safe, okay?” Alex pleads, the desperation in his voice betraying that he means so much more beyond the current predicament, as do the absent circles his thumb rubs against Michael’s ankle, unconsciously seeking tactile reassurance. 

Michael allows himself to close his eyes, and for a moment, the entire world narrows to the sliver of space where Alex’s skin meets his. It’s too small to exist there -- that’s always been their problem.

“Fuck,” Michael swears under his breath when he remembers where he is. He calls down to Alex, “I’m safe when I’m focused. So can you not--” 

Alex quickly removes his hand from Michael, but leaves the other on the ladder. Trying to shake off the familiar grim thought that he’s making Michael unsafe.

“Alex--”

“Sorry.”

Michael sighs. “I’m coming down.”

The rung two steps from the ground breaks as Michael sets a second foot on it. Alex reaches out for Michael’s waist instinctively. It’s not entirely helpful as they stumble back together, trip, and end up in a heap on the ground. 

“Good thing you were here to catch me or I might have landed on my ass," Michael laughs.

Alex lies still and silent beside him.

“Are you okay?” Michael asks, turning his head towards Alex.

“Yeah,” Alex says quickly. He sounds like he’s in pain. But it’s not physical. 

“I didn’t _let_ you catch me after Caulfield. After Max," Michael says, as if he'd read Alex's mind. "I understand now that you tried. That you wanted to. I just thought that dealing with _us_ on top of all of that would crush me.”

“You asked me for space.” _Begged, pleaded, sobbed._ “And then you never came around to let me back in. And I was too scared to ask for permission. Because you might say no. Or you might have said yes. And if you said yes, I was going to have to let you into _my_ space.” Alex pauses to sip at the air. “It’s hard to let ourselves be vulnerable with anyone, with what we’ve been through.”

“It’s hard. But over and over, we show our bellies to each other,” Michael says, beginning to sit up.

Alex thinks it’s a funny way to put it until Michael nods pointedly towards Alex’s torso and Alex realizes his shirt had ridden up in their fall. 

“And then we get hurt,” Alex says, as he sits up and pulls down his shirt, then hugs his knees to his chest, “By the person we most want comfort from.”

Michael nods his agreement solemnly, discarding the words forming in his throat when they refuse to go smoothly, and without the sting in his eyes blooming to more. Instead he breathes deep and gets up, shaking himself off, then extending a hand to Alex. 

Michael cracks a grin once Alex is standing upright.

“You’ve got, like, an entire nest in your hair,” Michael says, reaching to remove some twigs and leaves. 

As his fingers run through an extra, unnecessary, time or two, Alex’s face softens and he bites his lip. 

“It’s gotten long. Isn’t that against the rules?” Michael says as he deploys all his willpower to withdraw his hand. 

“I dare someone to order me to cut it,” Alex quips.

Michael laughs at that. “But seriously, it looks good. Really good.”

“Thanks. It feels very… me.”

It’s no coincidence Michael likes it so much.

**~~~~~**


	3. Chapter 3

**~~~~~**

Alex borrows a better ladder from a neighbour. For the next week, when Alex is around for Michael’s use of it, he keeps a watchful eye but a respectful distance. Michael doesn’t make many trips now, staying on the roof for long stretches, floating everything he needs up from the ground -- including snacks that Alex offers him. 

For the first day all week, Alex comes home to Michael firmly planted on the ground, walking around from the back yard wearing a full toolbelt. 

“Whatcha working on back there?” Alex calls out as he approaches. 

“Ah, I know you didn’t ask me to but… I fixed the sauna.”

“You did?”

“Yeah! It was fun actually. Pretty technical. I had to do a bit of research but I tinkered and… seems to be working. I dunno… if you want to test it out?”

“Sure,” Alex agrees - Michael sounds so excited that Alex couldn't possibly say no - “Now?”

“I have some time now. If you don’t mind me slacking on the job.”

“I definitely don’t mind,” Alex says, smiling. “What do we need? Just towels? I haven’t actually been in a sauna before.”

“Neither have I.”

They don’t mean to, but they treat the sauna like their own private alternate dimension. 

They undress in the dry, room temperature, antechamber, unexpectedly bashful as they carefully maneuver so their backs are turned to each other until they’ve secured their towels in place around their hips, and stacked their clothes in their respective corners, along with a fresh towel to dry off with afterwards. 

“I’m going to go inside, take off my prosthetic quickly, then get you to bring it back out here,” Alex explains.

Michael follows him inside the sauna, then tries not to watch too closely as Alex sits, and his hands disappear under the towel to reach the top of the sleeve on his thigh. 

Alex hands the prosthetic to Michael, who disappears for a moment. Alex looks around the room - he hasn’t been inside since he first got the cabin. It’s all smooth wood, nooks to sit, shelves for drinks, and a little strip of windows above one of the benches. 

Michael returns then, stopping in the doorway to check the thermometer. 

“Is the temperature okay? I didn’t set it too hot. But we’re going to sweat,” Michael says, as he sits next to Alex - but on the other side of wide arm rest with a drink holder. 

“It’s perfect. You did a great job fixing it.”

“Thanks,” Michael says, unsure whether the flush he feels is because of the heat or the praise.

The shy beginnings have set a quiet mood to start, then when the heat makes them hazy, and the relative dark of the room makes them brave, it’s easy to slip into that pocket through a new door. 

In hushed voices, they speak of dreams. 

Of Michael’s desire to find a career where he can use his brain, or doing something meaningful. Or both. Both would be the best. 

Of Alex’s indecision about leaving the air force because he truly doesn’t know what he wants to do next. 

They speak of family, but not of each other. 

Michael wants to become closer with Isobel and Max, in a way he never had a chance to before. He’s been making efforts, but old habits die hard for all three of them. 

Alex has been trying to reconnect more with his mother. He’s learned so much now about why she left. He cuts himself short, unsure if it’s okay to talk about with Michael. But Michael encourages him, coaxes him, even.

They want happy things for each other. 

_They want._

_The pieces, they want._

It’s one of many things left unsaid, for even here it’s not safe, not while they’re afraid to touch, afraid to speak too loud, with more than bellies bared.

They awkwardly shuffle into small talk, voices gaining volume, returning to their easy banter of late, skirting above the surface of more complicated things, until it’s past time they get out of the sauna.

Michael sluggishly gets up to turn down the temperature, then turns back to Alex. “Ready for your leg?”

“I think my leg is a bit swollen. It’s not going to fit.”

“Oh, shit, I never thought about--”

“No, it’s fine. I knew this would happen. I just didn’t think about how that would make it difficult for me to get back to the house.” Alex shakes his head, “Just when I think I’ve finally gotten used to the thing and anticipating every issue…”

“I can float you back to the house, it’s no problem,” Michael offers.

“No, that’s-- thanks. But if you could just go get my full crutches from my bedroom, that would be great.”

“Or I could give you a piggy-back ride,” Michael suggests with a slyly innocent smile and a shrug.

Alex quirks an eyebrow, “A piggy back ride?”

“Save a horse, ride a cowboy.”

Alex laughs, “Just bring me the dry towel and my clothes. Then we’ll see, cowboy.”

It’s a struggle for Alex to put his clothes back on in the still-warm sauna room, his skin remaining clammy no matter how he tries to dry himself with the fresh towel. Michael has an easier time changing in the dry antechamber. 

A blur of gentle teasing and giggles -- _You’ll drop me! -- Where’s your sense of adventure?_ \-- leads them into the piggy-back option. 

As Michael bounds them across the lawn, he is certain that Alex’s boisterous, care-free laugh in his ear is the greatest sound he’s ever heard.

Michael somewhat reluctantly sets Alex down on the floor in the cabin next to an armchair. Alex slides off his back, but clings tightly around Michael’s shoulders still as he steadies onto his foot, and Michael feels a ghostly nuzzle against the back of his neck that sends a shiver down his spine. 

The desire to turn in Alex’s arms and kiss him is nearly overwhelming, but he resists, the weight of history between them still unsettled. Alex slowly lets go as he grabs a hold of the arm chair, then swings himself into the seat by the time Michael has turned around. 

“I’ll be right back,” Michael announces, before heading outside.

Michael returns in a minute from outside with Alex’s leg and their towels. “What do you want to drink? We have to rehydrate after all that sweating.”

“Just water, thanks.”

They’re a little twitchy as they finish their drinks, losing the excuse to have their mouths occupied, now having to either withstand silence, or _talk_. It’s a bizarrely terrifying prospect given the time they just spent in the sauna doing nothing _but_ talking. It’s just different in the bright, open cabin -- it feels as though everything they say can and will be held against them. 

And worse, they both recognize they’ve snuck up on each other, travelling at night down the side streets, ever avoiding the high-noon showdown. It needs to be different this time. 

“Well--” Michael starts to get up. 

“There’s something I need to show you,” Alex blurts out. 

Michael freezes. "Can it wait? I've got a shift soon. But if it’s important I could--"

"No, no. Another time,” Alex waves him off. 

**~~~~~**

Michael is at the cabin strange hours the next few days. Alex only catches him for coffee or a drink a few times. They chat a little each day, but every time feels like setback. Just yesterday, their fingers had touched in the hand-off of a mug, and they’d jolted apart hard enough that Michael had ended up with a healthy splash of coffee on his shirt. 

This morning, Alex is on the porch working on his laptop.

"I wish you wouldn't sit out there before I'm done working on it," Michael says as he walks up. 

"I didn't think you were coming today so I thought I could get away with it," Alex confesses. 

Michael is annoyed, but not at Alex. He’s mostly teasing him about the roof collapsing. 

"My shift got cancelled for tonight. They keep screwing around with the schedule. So I figured I'd work today and sleep tonight instead of the other way around. If that's alright?"

"It's fine. If you don’t mind me working out here?"

Alex doesn’t get much work done. He mostly watches Michael work. When he feels guilty about that he decides to e-transfer Michael's next payment early. He regrets it when Michael’s phone pings. 

"Alex, what are you doing?" Michael asks when he looks up from his phone. 

"What?"

"It's not pay-day."

"I'm the boss,” Alex shrugs.

Michael cocks his head, as if to say, _Really? You’re going to pull that?_

"Your shifts keep getting cut, so I thought it would help,” Alex says, voice laced with concern, and thinking better, adds, “You're doing the work anyways."

"It's weird," Michael says, squirming under Alex’s gaze.

"You said this was a chance to have a simple business relationship," Alex reminds him, hoping that bringing them back to that simplicity, though a facade, will help ease things up between them. 

"Yeah, well, I'm an idiot,” Michael says. He means it but there’s a smile behind it. 

"Also my best employee,” Alex sings-songs at him. 

A grin blooms across Michael’s face. "Oh ya? Do I get a bonus for that?"

"Stay for steak and a beer tonight?"

"Just one beer?"

“You said only friends accept payment in _beers_.”

“I think… maybe we are. Friends,” Michael tests out the word cautiously. 

“Beers it is,” Alex says, smiling broadly. 

Hours later, after a full day of work, Michael uses Alex’s shower again before they spend a quiet dinner in front of the tv to be safe, and enjoy multiple beers. 

Alex eventually pipes up when he’s grown legitimately bored of the movie they’re watching. "There's something I need to show you. There’s a bunker under this cabin."

“Seriously? Does everyone in this town have a bunker?”

A few minutes later, they’re inside it, at the bottom of the ladder.

“Well this is different…”

“I’m planning to re-purpose it. It was used for detox. Long story. I think you’ve probably heard it by now from Rosa? Or Kyle?”

“Yeah, sort of. I didn’t realize that was in a bunker.”

“Yep… a bunker... complete with its own piece of spaceship console…” Alex says slowly as he heads towards the hidey-hole in the wall.

“What?” Michael says, following quickly behind him.

“Jim left a piece hidden down here…” Alex explains as he retrieves it and sits on the bed. “I’ve had it since before you showed my your bunker. I know I should have given it to you then and--”

“It’s ok,” Michael cuts him off, awed, gravitating towards the large piece, and to Alex.

Michael reaches out his hands as he sits next to Alex on the bed. Alex tries to give him the piece but Michael’s hands just ghost over and under it a few times, without taking on its weight. It glows happily under Michael’s touch -- it’s been so long since something not of this world has laid hands upon it.

When their fingers knock together as Michael finally takes the piece from Alex, neither of them flinch, awed by the flare of colour that shimmers over the piece as they touch. 

To Alex’s surprise, Michael gets up, and returns the piece to the wall. He gives it a gentle stroke before he turns back to Alex without covering up the hole.

“What are you doing?” Alex asks as Michael sits back down behind him. 

“Turns out what I was looking for was here on earth all along.”

Alex hangs his head, thinking of Caulfield. 

“Not just them, Alex. _You_.”

Alex takes a breath, then turns his head just enough to look at Michael and his big, sad, _hopeful_ puppy eyes. 

Michael gulps, breaking eye contact to stare at his hands, rubbing over his thighs nervously. “I lied about never being here before. To your cabin,” Michael confesses. 

“What do you mean?”

“I slept out in my truck parked at the end of your driveway a few nights,” Michael says quickly. 

“You--? When?” Alex asks, puzzled. It’s a long driveway, but he’s not sure how would have missed Michael parked there on multiple occasions.

“It was only a few random nights really... between Max dying and being brought back. That period of time is pretty much a blur,” Michael adds sheepishly. 

“Were you meaning to see me or…?”

“No… I would cut the engine and lights a bit before… use my powers to move the truck the rest of the way so you wouldn’t notice, and I always stayed at the end of the driveway, past the turn in the path. And when I’d leave I’d sweep up the tire tracks with my powers too. I mean, I guess there was the risk I might not wake up in time to get out of there but… subconsciously I probably wanted you to catch me, so...”

“Michael…” Alex says, and while it doesn’t go unnoticed, neither of them are in a state to consider why his first name slipped out now. “Why didn’t you ever come to the door?” Alex asks softly. 

Michael shrugs. “I'd told you I needed space. And you were respecting that. So showing up on your doorstep… I couldn’t. I didn’t want to jerk you around like that. Not when I’d already… Not when it hurt so much. I couldn’t do it to myself either - seeing you. But… things were bad, Alex.” Michael takes a shaky breath. “I used to go sleep out in the desert when things got like that, but with _knowing_ my family wasn’t coming for me? I couldn’t-- I couldn’t stomach it. So instead I decided to camp out near the person who once screamed in my face that I was his family, and hope that it -- this thing he’d said when we were about to die -- was true.”

“It is true,” Alex says, tears glistening in his eyes, “You’re my family.”

“I know. I know that now. But I still don’t know what that looks like? We’re friends now… is that all we’re gonna be?” Michael rushes the next words, racing the tears threatening to fall. “This past month it’s occurred to me that I could probably live off the sound of you laughing and if it’s not going to be me making you laugh every day, that you’re smiling at, well that’s going to really fucking suck because I love you, I’m in love with you, and I’m always going to be, and--” 

Alex surges forward, but when Michael doesn’t meet him halfway, he freezes. “I’m sorry-- I thought--”

Michael flings himself into Alex’s arms instead, and they embrace, awkward only for their positions sitting side by side on the bed, melting into each other, wet cheek against wet cheek. 

“I want you to kiss me,” Michael sniffles in Alex’s ear, “Believe me I do. I want it so bad. But I don’t want us to be crying.”

“Okay, okay,” Alex nods against Michael’s shoulder, squeezing him tighter.

“'Cause this time feels different. It doesn’t feel like a crash landing.” _It feels like coming home._

“Huh?” 

“I just-- I wanna try, Alex. I wanna try.” 

“We’re going to try. We are, okay?”

They trade whispered assurances as they coax each other down onto the bed, curling up there, holding each other close, and drifting off to a peaceful sleep. 

Alex wakes, disoriented, a few hours later, to his hip protesting his position with the prosthetic. He carefully extracts himself from Michael's arms and sits up to take off his jeans and remove it. 

“'Lex?” Michael mumbles groggily, reaching for him.

“I’m not going anywhere," Alex calls out softly over his shoulder as he starts to wiggle back into his jeans, sans prosthetic.

Michael’s hand fists in the back of Alex's t-shirt to be sure.

**~~~~~**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Click here for an illustration of that piggy back ride by @neverheardabout1d on tumblr!](https://neverheardabout1d.tumblr.com/post/188526190591/illustration-for-the-fic-i-could-build-a-home-for)


	4. Chapter 4

**~~~~~**

Michael wakes up the next morning to fingers in his hair - playing in unfamiliar patterns - and a smiling Alex next to him.

“Mornin’,” Michael drawls.

“Hi,” Alex says cheerfully. 

“What ‘re you doing to my head?” Michael asks sleepily.

Alex laughs, “My shampoo really did a number on your hair. It’s all floofy.”

Michael scrunches his face with concern as he reaches to try to pat it down.

“Stop, stop,” Alex coos at him, “You look beautiful,” he says, turning serious as his fingers caress Michael’s cheek. “I love you.”

Michael smiles a goofy lopsided smile, which he half hides against the pillow, then whispers, “For the record, this moment is happy enough for that first kiss.”

Alex doesn’t need to be told twice. He rolls into Michael and claims his mouth in a searing kiss that has ‘ _I’ve missed you_ ’ written all over it. 

_I’ve missed you my whole life and I don’t want to miss you anymore, ever again._

The first kiss quickly turns into ten of equal fervor, each punctuated only by short gaspy breaths between them.

When their hands begin to wander, Alex noses Michael away gently so he can get a word in. “Mmhm, let’s not get too carried away, cowboy.”

Michael licks his lips, then smirks, “You want to take things slow? Because I’d be happy just kissing you all day.”

“Slow… might be good. We need to do a lot of talking. With words.”

_And not just the words you kiss into my skin._

“I agree. So, what are the rules?” Michael queries. 

“I don’t think we need hard and fast rules? We just don’t get to use sex to avoid talking about things that we need to.”

“Are you going to be enforcing that?” Michael smirks. 

“Team effort, Guerin,” Alex chides playfully. 

“I’ll be a good boy,” Michael says with a wink, reaching for Alex, kissing him just once, restrained, _slow_ and _deep_.

Alex moans into Michael’s mouth just as he pulls away.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Michael groans, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t tease us.”

Alex grumbles something inaudible and tugs Michael close, and they return to just holding each other. It feels _good_ , and it’ll be enough, for now.

After a few minutes pass, Michael whispers into Alex’s hair, “I can _hear_ you thinking. What else is in our recipe for success?”

Alex sighs, “Much as I’d like to stay here in our little bubble… I think we need to venture out into the real world. Be _us_ , out there.”

“And do what? Hold hands in public?” Michael asks a little skeptically - PDA is far from the solution to their problems. 

“I don’t know,” Alex confesses, squirming, trying to bury a little closer to Michael, though that’s near impossible. 

“I mean, don't get me wrong, that would be nice. But I don’t need that from you. Not right now,” Michael assures him gently as his hand wanders to find Alex’s and laces their fingers together. 

“I know, but… that was one of our _pocket_ promises, wasn’t it? When we were seventeen? That once we were in charge of our lives… Once we got out of this town...” he trails off.

“You remember a lot more of those conversations than you've let on,” Michael notes, giving an encouraging squeeze of Alex’s hand in his. 

“They’ve been coming back to me these last few weeks,” Alex admits. 

Michael hums contentedly into Alex’s hair, “To me too.”

It takes awhile for them to leave the bed. It’s only when their stomachs and bladders command their attention that they finally get up. 

They decide, unwisely, to go out for breakfast as a way to get out in the world; by the time they arrive they’re both ravenous, order too much, and stuff themselves uncomfortably full. 

Their next decision is a better one -- walking off their breakfast in a nearby park. Mid-morning on a weekday, it’s almost empty. 

After doing an entire lap of the park with their knuckles brushing hesitantly between them, Alex slips his hand into Michael’s. 

Although there is no one around, they don’t need to ask if it counts. 

The sun is high is the sky. 

**~~~~~**

A few weeks, some tears, and many conversations later, Michael and Alex continue to make progress. 

They also enjoy the sauna from time to time - and today is one of those days.

“Oh, I forgot to re-stock after I did the laundry,” Alex says as he surveys the near empty stack of towels on the shelf in the antechamber. “I’ll go get more.”

“There are two here,” Michael tries to say casually, knowing that’s not enough. 

They have a system -- two towels to wear, two towels to dry off, and they bring Alex’s crutches with them. They tried wearing swim trunks once, but decided the light cotton towels were more comfortable in the sauna. 

Alex raises one eyebrow. “Are you suggesting…?”

“Uh, yeah, guess I am,” Michael gulps, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, “Unless you think it’s a bad idea?”

“We’ve been behaving ourselves…” Alex says thoughtfully, then licks his lips and smirks, “A little test of impulse control wouldn’t be the worst thing.”

Michael smiles slyly back at him. “I gotta tell ya, I haven’t been studying.”

“If we fail, I’m sure a re-test can be arranged…”

The flirting ends abruptly as they stand in their usual corners of the antechamber and strip. Michael is faster. He heads into the sauna, plays with the temperature controls a bit, then starts to pace over to the far side of the room, hands on his hips, waiting for Alex. 

Alex tries, and fails, not to check out Michael’s ass when he enters. He regains his focus and sits down at the closest bench and removes his prosthetic, placing it on the shelf next to him. 

At the sound of the prosthetic clunking down, Michael finally turns around.

Their eyes flick over each other quickly, then away. Michael makes a beeline to pick up the prosthetic and whisks it away into the antechamber. 

Michael takes several deep breaths before he re-enters the sauna. He imagines what he might find inside -- perhaps Alex splayed out in the corner, gorgeous, confident, glistening in sweat, eyes closed, panting in the heat, hand already on his cock--

 _Fuck_ , Michael thinks. All bets are off if that’s the case. 

Instead, Michael enters to find Alex curled up modestly in the corner, one bent leg hiding all the goods. But as Michael’s cock twitches in interest, and his heart in yearning, he realizes that all bets are off when it comes to Alex anyways. 

Alex involuntarily turns his head as he hears the door click shut, and there stands Michael in all his naked glory. Alex tries to focus on his face, but Michael’s tongue darting out to wet his lips has Alex looking there, and then, _lower_. Alex bites his lip as his eyes drift down to Michael’s cock, hanging soft and heavy between his legs.

Michael sits directly opposite the bench, slouching, arms thrown over the back of the seat, knees spread wide, and his face tight with the effort to restrain a large, impish, grin.

“What’s that about?” Alex teases, nodding at his choice of position. 

Michael shrugs innocently, “It’s hotter than balls in here. They need the air.”

“Uh huh, sure,” Alex laughs, shaking his head.

Miraculously, they manage to carry on some conversation, and even come up with dinner plans for the evening. 

When silence eventually falls on them, Alex stares out into the yard through the window situated just above his bench. 

“I was thinking, maybe we could build a gazebo, right there in the yard,” Alex muses.

"You know, Alex, you don’t need to come up with handyman excuses to keep me coming around?" Michael teases.

"I know,” Alex says, “But I do need excuses to look out this window instead of at you."

"Why’s that?” Michael drawls, “Nothing you haven't seen before."

Alex huffs a laugh, "Well, the thrill is _not_ gone..." Alex lets his bent leg down, planting his foot on the floor, to reveal his cock, half-hard, and sitting up against his belly.

"Fuck,” Michael rattles out. 

"I don't think we should attempt anything quite so vigorous in this heat," Alex teases. 

"No, but we should attempt _something_?" Michael says hopefully, voice a little high with arousal. 

"Come 'ere," Alex beckons warmly.

As it turns out, wooden benches are not the most comfortable for bare knees and elbows, and only several kisses in, Michael is urging Alex to stand, his foot on the ground and his other leg with his knee on the bench, until Michael is hoisting him up, hands on his ass, then hooking under his thighs before waddling them two feet over and sitting Alex down in a smooth shelf-nook. 

“You’re a fucking genius, Guerin,” Alex groans rather delightedly as he discovers that in this position, their cocks line up _perfectly._

Michael’s responding chuckle is cut short when Alex scoots closer to the edge to wrap his legs tighter around Michael’s hips again, and grinds them together. 

Their bodies slip and slide easily against each other, skin slick with sweat, cocks swelling in the light friction as they busy their hands and lips with kisses. 

Once they’re both hard, Michael reaches between them, taking them together in hand, and stroking in earnest. Michael’s free hand travels up and down Alex’s back, first firm at the back of his neck, into his hair, to deepen their kiss, then down to his ass, fingers sinking into flesh, then letting go, before dancing up his spine instead, with a touch so teasing that Alex whines and bucks his hips until Michael holds him closer. 

It’ll be quick -- the heat is driving Michael crazy, Alex’s hot skin against his, under his fingers, driving some deeply primal urge he files away for later. 

For his part, Alex’s hands run _all_ over Michael, digging into his ass, blunt nails scratching over his back, fingers on his neck and jaw, then occasionally slipping between their chests, making just enough space for his thumbs to rub over Michael’s nipples -- but among all of that roaming, Alex’s hands never stay out of Michael’s curls for long, always finding their way back.

It feels like they’re racing the heat towards the finish line, and it doesn’t take long before they’re both spilling out over Michael’s hand, moans and gasps swallowed in more kisses as they shudder against each other, lips slowing as heavy, panted, breaths can no longer be held at bay, and they collapse into each other, embracing instead. 

Between quivering aftershocks they find the strength to pass _I love you_ ’s between them before their breathing has evened out - which takes a while in the heat, their clinging together, sweaty and sticky, not speeding the process either. 

Eventually they become squirmy in each other’s arms for how hot it is, but they’re lazy about moving, so much enjoying this quiet moment. 

That is, until Michael snorts in Alex’s ear.

“What’s so funny?” Alex asks. 

“Ah, you realize your handyman just gave you a handy?” Michael says gleefully.

Alex’s groaned out laughter vibrates in Michael’s bones before the sweet sound of it reaches his ears.

 _Yes_ , Michael thinks to himself, he really could live off the stuff.

**Author's Note:**

> I was heavily inspired by the beautiful film A Moment in the Reeds. I highly recommend that you go check it out! [Click here to visit its website ](https://amomentinthereeds.com/) and find out how to watch! It has a handyman, two men in love, and a sauna.


End file.
